You've got a real type of thing going down, gettin' down. There's a whole lot of Jesus going round

Julie Kelsey: "Who brought Jesus?"
Student: "I did."
Julie Kelsey: "Why did you bring Jesus?"

Overheard: Nouwen Chapel (preaching section)

I bet Spuds Mckenzie had two names, too. Look what happened to him.

Student 1: "The first Handsome Dan is named Sherman."
Student 2: "Two names? This dog is going to have an identity crisis."
Student 3: "No. It's like nobility."
Student 1: "Or the pope. He has two names."
Student 2: "I dunno. The pope looks pretty confused most of the time."

Overheard: Commuter Lounge

What exactly happens in that back room, Micah?

Student 1: "They're doing pictures with Santa at the Yale Bookstore. Do you think I could bring my cat?"
Student 2: "What, as a burnt offering?"

Overheard: Commuter Lounge

Yeah, that should probably make you uncomfortable.

MAR student: "I guess white is appropriate for today" (wine, that is)
MDiv student: "Is that a colonizer joke?"

Overheard: Thanksgiving Dinner

Awww! I love inclusivity

MAR Student: "Hurry up! We can't pray without the atheist."

Overheard: Thanksgiving Dinner

Mike G, take note. Our safety is in your hands.

YDS Alumnus: "Can you kill those things?"
MAR Student: "No, not yet. I don't have the right jelly beans."

Related:

• Uh oh
• creepy?
• on the other hand, these are awesome for training and I'm accepting donations

I love you, whoever you are.

Student 1: "You're all talking about burning heretics, when all of us would probably be the ones being burned under these laws."

Student 2: "No, no, no. It all depends who's in power. If you're in power you get to burn everyone who disagrees. Orthodoxy is the heresy that wins"

Overheard: Refectory

I don't know. Was it a mitre, tiara, crown of thorns, skullcap, or beret?

Student: "The guy in the funny hat is Jesus, right?"

(looking at a slideshow of artist's representation of the resurrection of Jesus)

Overheard: Introduction to the New Testament

It might be time for a brain reboot, sir.

Denys Turner: Oh damn. I've forgotten my memory stick.

Think of it as passing the peace

During Hearty Eucharist:

Student: "I keep wondering if it's inappropriate to say 'cheers' with the blood of Christ."

Overheard: Marquand

Take these baby carrots, they are my fingers, given for thee

Student1: "So, what does this 'Hearty Eucharist' consist of?"
Student2: "What you're really asking is, 'what's in this body of Christ, so I can decide whether I wish to partake?'"...
Student2: Take this hummus. It is my nervous system, given for thee.

Overheard in: Commuter Lounge, just before "Hearty Eucharist."

Good thing these submissions are anonymous

MAR student: "Why didn't the Jesuits use the idea of purgatory with the Indians?"
MDiv 1: "Well, to enter purgatory you have to be baptized at birth."
MDiv 2: "So what about the good souls who weren't baptized?"
MDiv 1: "If you weren't baptized you went to Dante's outermost level of hell. Which isn't bad, but it's not great. It's kinda like Jersey."

Overheard: Transitional Moments of Western Christian History Section

Who says I don't?

Denys Turner: "The Song of Songs is about GREAT sex. You just all wish you could have sex that good."

Overheard: History of Biblical Interpretation

Is that of the Far or Near Universe?

Prof. David Eastman: "Wait... quick what is that cartoon where all the little robots make the big robot? Yeah... The Trinity is not Voltron."

(Regarding Augustine's interpretation of the Trinity)

Overheard: Patristics

Only if the Holy Spirit is the wind beneath my wings

MDiv student: "Don't you think that Bette* Midler is a Psalmist of our time?"

Some day you just might

Student: "You should see the things they have in the shape of a penis!"

Overheard: Coffee Shop

That's STYLE, people

MDiv student: "Dorothy Day is Big Willy."

Overheard: Commuter Lounge

This is for her "Tulip" alum

Thank you, Lindsay. Come back.

Prevening Ministerial Misconduct has many layers of benefits

MDiv student: "Show me what good touch is!"

It's all from Adam's rib, of course

MAR student speaking to a costume party attendee: " I want to know: From what did you construct your breasts?"

Overheard: Saints and Sinners