Jesus said dress for the best

Student 1: I really like Pentacost. It makes me feel like it is appropriate to wear red sequins to church.
Student 2: I love Ash Wednesday. I just wanna dip my face in the ashes and rub it around. Feel the passion of Christ, you know.


Overheard in: Common Room

Solid.

Student on a cell phone: I want to change my superhero name from 'The Liturgizer' to 'Dude-Erono-Mystic'... no, not just 'deuteronomistic,' but dude dash erono dash mystic... I don't know, what do you want 'erono' to mean? We make up words here all the time.

Overheard: Outside ISM great hall
Overheard by: non-ISM student getting food before colloquium

Someone's got to bear the Christ

Sister: I'm wearing this really cute dress to midnight mass. What are you wearing, Mom?
Mom: I think I'll just wear my robe and go as the Theotokos.

Overheard at YDS is taking a break until next semester starts, so it'll be a little slow around here for awhile.

If you happen to overhear something funny while you're at home, eating that pecan pie with your great aunt Mildred, be sure to send it in. Old relatives are some of the best at saying ridiculous things.

Have a satisfactory, non-denominational, capitalist, wintertime gift-giving season!

Or a Merry Christmas. Take that, Bill O'Reilly.

Peter Martens: No one wants God to be fair, we all got problems.

Overheard at: History of Christian Theology to 451

What a move, from Calvin to Slash

Student 1: I’ve gave myself an early Christmas present … Did you know Slash from Guns'n'Roses wrote an autobiography?
Student 2: Shut up.

Overheard at: YDS Library

Sexiest ever? No.

Student 1: Emile Durkheim... The man, the myth...
Student 2: The mustache!

Someone's excited

Student: (reading book) Trinity of inclusion? This is going in my paper like whoa.

Alvin and Theodore are sad

Student 1: So I just Wikipedia'd the Chipmonk you said I am...
Student 2: Simon?
Student 1: Yeah, and a little part of me died.

Those librarians know how to throw a party

Librarian 1: Are you going to the party at Sterling tonight?
Librarian 2: Yes, are you?
Librarian 1: Yes. It's too bad they had to move it from Beineke, but apparently last year some boy pooped on the floor.


Overheard at: YDS Library

It's a good question

Student 1: I'm going to go spend some quality time with JC.
(Grabs a book, and heads off to study.)

Student 2, shouts after them: Which one, John Collins, John Calvin, or Jesus Christ?


Overheard at: 794 Winchester St.

God bless transubstantiation

Student: So...I'm pretty buzzed on the blood of Christ right now...

Overheard: YDS Outing

That'll go over well at coffee hour

Bryan Spinks: I just hate it when ministers say: "Shall we pray?" It always makes me want to say: "No, let's play strip-poker instead!"

Overheard: Foundations of Christian Worship

So many theologians, so little time

Student 1: So, do you want to hang out tonight?
Student 2: No, I can't. I have a date!
Group of Students: Awwwww!!!
Student 2: With Rahner.
Group of Students: ....oh....

Overheard: Common Room

Amen, sister.

Student: For our test, they're requiring that we memorize the Bible and write it down backwards and upside down... just because they can.
Non-Div School Friend: It sounds like they're testing you on God by putting you through hell.

So that's the good news.

Student 1: I've got a date with the second half of Matthew.

Student 2: Don't worry, I've been there and he puts out.

Student 1: How does a gospel put out? If it has a passion narrative? Well then they're all easy.

Overheard at: Commuter Lounge

Rock, paper, scissors?

Student 1: We're like the trinity.

Student 2: I get to be the Holy Spirit, because I'm mysterious... oooh.

Student 3: I'm the Father 'cause I want to rule everything.

Student 2: Ha, ha, you have to be Jesus.

Student 3: And die!

Overheard at: Commuter Lounge

Out of context, yes?

Student: You don't deserve the awesomeness of my nuts.

Overheard at: Reading week

What a vote of confidence

Student: Childbirth was easier than OT!
Carolyn Sharp: We should just hand out epidurals.

Anglicans can get shaggy

Student 1: I love Rowan Williams and his beard.
Student 2: And his eyebrows!

Overshare on someone's part.

(group of naked YDSers run by)
Student: Wow, that was a lot of pubic hair.

Overheard at: Quad during Tree-Trimming party

Right on.

Brandon Johnson: And now Carrie and I are going to sing for you.
(Child starts crying)

Overheard at: Tree-Trimming party

That's a bit of a mix up...

NT Teaching Fellow: Mel Gibson is apparently Jewish... I mean Matthew.

That's the last time he gets an invite

Dale Peterson: Sorry everyone... It's the UCC/DOC people, so try to not revolt. Or be revolted.

All your church hymns are belong to us

Student 1: When it comes to church music, I'm like an 88 year old man. Only A Mighty Fortress Is Our God and things written before that.
Student 2: So only music written 400 years ago?

Overheard at: BAR

Damn the Mosaic law

Jeremy Hultin: In the purity code, you can't offer your children up to Molech... (class laughter) I know, I know, so restrictive.

Overheard at: NT

That's one holy shrine I'm avoiding

Student 1: Sometime I want to take a pen and connect all of the freckles on my body.
Student 2: I bet it'd make the face of Jesus.