Not everyone can live in the Div School Apartments

Student: Hah, God's a bushdweller, according to Deuteronomy.

People in real life are getting married, too

Student: People on facebook are getting married and I'm in my convent still!

The only maid I want to be is Maid Marion, but that's because of my Robin Hood steal-from-the-rich-give-to-the-poor complex

Woman: I don't like the term "maid of honor" ... It's marital status-ist!

Overheard: Commuter Lounge

Brush up on your anatomy, buddy

Gay div student: That does not look like a vagi... does it?


Overheard: While playing a party game

At least learning about God in a classroom

Episcopal MDiv: I just finished my last theology class! I didn't tell my bishop, but I am done learning about God.

Overheard at: dinner party

Tankinis are!

Student: I don't know how people wear bikinis... It must not be my spiritual gift.

At least you got your global warming joke right

Sister: I was taking my Ecology test and it asked how old the Earth was.
Student: Did you put 6,000 years?
Sister: Damn, I put 4,000! I messed up my Bible joke!

You sound like forestry students

Student 1: There was so much tree semen on our patio table this morning.
Student 2: We should walk around in body suits so that the trees don't impregnate us.

Good thing you came to a bbq

German guy: I collect meat.

Overheard: End of Year BBQ

The commuter lounge is the lowest common denominator of div school students

Student in the background: "It's like making out with a giant piece of chicken."
Bruce Gordon: "I had high expectations when I came to Yale, and I'm glad to know my expectations were met."

overheard: commuter lounge

E-dar? I like it!

Student 1: Look at their website. Use your evangelical eyes and see what you think.
Student 2: My e-dar?

Next is baby pictures

Student: This is the benefit of going to a Christian college… There are always wedding photos on facebook I haven’t seen.

They'll make you more, you know

Student 1: Ugh! God! They are out of coffee! All four, out of coffee!
Student 2: Good thing it's exam time, cause someone's getting a little bit testy...

Overheard in the refectory:

What heterophobia

MAR Student: Yeah, so if there were any chance of me being turned gay, [blank] would be the one to do it.
MAR Student 2: But you're really straight, though. You're so straight, it's borderline destructive.
MAR Student 1: I'm destructively heterosexual?
MAR Student 2: Yup.

Where: Curtis Hall

You need a drink

Student 1: Did you know Hillary Clinton has a job approval rating of 71%? That's crazy!
Student 2: Do you know what else is crazy? The low, low prices at Barbarino's Chevy!
Student 3: Bar-bar-bar-bar-bar-barino! .... oh my god, this week needs to be over.

But who is Ronald McDonald?

MAR Student: It's just like corporate America. She'll be the Philip Morris of the Div School.

overheard: sunday brunch

Good logic.

M. Div 1: I just don't think that Jesus could have saved the world in three years if he was straight. Straight men aren't that efficient.
M. Div 2: Right. Further proof that Jesus was a woman.

Take some more then

(grabs left over food from conference and shoves 3 or 4 bagels in bag)
Student: These are the good bagels. You can't let these go.

But you're reading

Student, while reading the Acts of Paul: This is like watching a bad beer commercial!

Because he wasn't there?

(mentions another student)
Student 1: Is he a second year?
Student 2: No, he's a first year.
Student 1: Ok, that makes sense. I don't remember seeing him last year.